Thursday, February 10, 2005

Whats with Valentine's day and gifting ?

No, I am not a Shiv Sainik who is against the celebration of V Day because of moral crap. That is pure bullshit from people who have nothing else to do and whose wives dont get the attention they deserve from their husbands. I am a sane, literate person who questions the increasing pressure and focus on V Day. Its been 5 years since I was in India for V Day. So forgive me if I am out of touch with things there.In the US, things are now at a point where the amount of caring and love you have for a person is increasingly being measured in terms of extremely tangible metrics like how many carats is the engagement ring, how many tiers are in the wedding cake and yeah, how many roses did you give to her for Valentine's Day. Added to this are what gifts to give for V Day. Is it thoughtful or insensitive. The works.

I understand that February the 14th is a day for people in love to express in some way or the other, their feelings for their lovers. Cool. I am all for it. But to have the expression of love being measured in terms of material things is taking this a bit too far. I have gifted my girlfriend and now my wife for every single of the V Days we have been together and am glad to note that she doesnt measure my gifts with any yardstick but the fact that I remembered and gave her something. Unfortunately my friends have a whole different story to tell me about their V Days, ranging from getting some really special action or getting none based on their gifts, being kicked out to the couch courtesy a bad gift and so on. Is this really how a Valentine's day is supposed to be ?

Are we losing track of the simple pleasures of live and giving anything and everything a tangible and material twist ?

17 comments:

Sangeeta said...

Yeah! That's a sad state of affairs, thanks to marketing strategies by greeting card companies. and this will always be the story till gullible yougsters get taken in by such tactics

The Last Blogger said...

Sangeeta
Thanks for stopping by. Lots of things need to change to put things where they should be. Greeting cards are only the tip of the iceberg. Movies, songs, so many things need to understand that too much mush is crap.

saranyan r said...

thank God I don't have a girl friend :-)
but generally I have a principle of not giving gifts and not accepting gifts.

The Last Blogger said...

Paran
Someday when you have a friend who is a girl, a girlfriend or a wife, you'll know :)

While I agree in principle to not giving and taking mostly, sometimes I do think exceptions can be made. But the key is gifting should happen totally by choice and not because of societal or relation driver considerations.

Ranj said...

Reminds me of a dialogue from Kannathil Muthamittal when Prakash Raj explains to Maddy about how someone out there benefits from the existence of wars... In SIngapore, a rose on that day costs $50 at least. People have to walk around with flowers or teddy bears!!! As sad as it is, I am amused by it all..

The Last Blogger said...

Jagan
Good point. But see the thing is with the entire world moving towards embracing V day more and more (thanks to the western influence), the peer pressure levels are huge. Imagine a college where two girls are expecting gifts from their respective boyfriends. Wouldnt they compare notes on what they got and then essentially who is better ?

The Last Blogger said...

Ranj
America is no different. Prices of flowers shoot up during this time and well, ppl still buy it. Its a case of supply and demand where on this day, the supply, irrespective of how much it is, is always going to be less than the demand, intentionally of course.

Anonymous said...

the whole act is purely commercial
only gullible people fall for it

The Last Blogger said...

Jagan
Thankfully I wasnt in such position. But many folks in the US and increasingly in India, are. Sad but true.

Nth Dimension said...

Ah, another good rant on the materialism of the "decadent" west. Jokes apart, it does sometimes feel like the ad-blitz on the telly actually forces people into compliance for fear of being left out. If I was a conspiracy theorist, I would've said it was the zombification of the common people to the benefit of the corporations..

The Last Blogger said...

Daph
Thanks for stopping by. If I remember your name right, you are one of Pradeep's friends.
Coming to your comment, sadly its no more a thing of the decadent west. A thing of the decadent world is more like it. And yes, its definitely the fear of being left out that makes most of us do it, even if we dont want to.

Twin-Gemini said...

A funny incident happened at work a couple of days back. We go for coffee breaks in large groups to the Cafeteria and in one such break, a newly married colleague of mine asked the already married folks for advice on what to get on VDay for his wife. Promptly came the reply from another guy: set the rules right, tell her your family does not celebrate VDays. If you buy her something expensive this time, then you will need to match it or beat it the subsequent years, so best to use this technique. Everybody had a good laugh. :-)

I am pretty sure he didnt listen to this advice :-)

The Last Blogger said...

Twin-Gemini
That was hilarious and yes, its hard to get by without the proverbial V-Day gifts like chocolates/cake, flowers and that extra thing. If you know of someone who's wife is PERFECTLY alright without that V-Day gift, lemme know.

Prabha said...

Yea!we are losing the simple pleasures in life.Doesn't look like Valentine's day has got anything to do with love!

The Last Blogger said...

Prabha
Thanks for stopping by. Yes, it appears as if Valentine's Day is more about gifts than it is about the love.

Chakra said...

bit late on this one..

I hate this V day stuff... agreed abt the peer pressure, but I feel that it is ridiculous that u think abt love & affection only on Feb 14.. last year was the first V day after our wedding and i made sure that i didn't get anything even subconsciously.. at work, every T, D & H hassled abt what i got her for that day and so many of her friends inquired later abt that... thankfully, my wife shares the same view - at least as far as i understood... so, didn't give into this madnesss.

The Last Blogger said...

Chakra
I concur on the V day thing. I dont understand why that one day when you have to go out of the way to express your love for your girlfriend or wife. My wife has been on my side on this one, although I succumbed and did get her something for V day.

ESPN.com - MLB

Engadget